Diagnosed with mental illness. Now what?

“They told me I had borderline personality disorder.  I felt crushed; but even more so; somewhere deep within, I felt relieved.  I now had a diagnosis.  I could now study and explore more on why I did the things I did; and how not to hurt the people I love the most.”

Being told that you have a mental illness may seem catastrophic at the moment, but believe me; it is not the end of the world. With appropriate treatment and timely   support, you can recover and achieve your life’s ambitions. No doubt; your path to recovery will have hurdles and obstacles; nevertheless, there is still hope.  If a diabetic can have his sugar levels controlled with appropriate treatment, help and support; so, can mental illness.

“You are not your illness. You have an individual story to tell. You have a name, a history, a personality. Staying yourself is part of the battle.” —Julian Seifter

Know that you are not alone.  Mental illness can strike anyone at any point of their lives.  Have you seen people stricken with grief after a loved one’s death?  Or those who resort to substances out of peer pressure, just to feel belonged and loved? 

I have been talking to several people who have gone through the initial shock of being diagnosed with a mental illness, and how over time, they have been able to lead successful lives.

It’s important to realize that you are not alone. Mental illnesses are common just as other illnesses.  You will realize that as time passes, you will have mastered the coping skills and identified what works best for you.  A proper diagnosis at the right time; compliance to medication and therapy, gaining adequate knowledge about your condition, medication and healthy coping strategies will help you not just to cope with your illness but also to gain control over it.

Once diagnosed, you need to plan on how to tell your loved ones, friends and well-wishers about your diagnosis.  Learn as much as you can and encourage your circle to do the same.   Think about the benefits and risks of opening up to your circle.  While they may be willing to make the necessary accommodations with you; they may also begin to look at you differently.  

“I was first diagnosed in 2015.  Life was good until I started acting strangely.    Fear, anxiety and my delusions made me afraid to enter into my own house.   I thought I had telepathic connections with three of my friends, that people communicated with me through characters I saw on the television.  I thought people were constantly following me and I was scared to enter into my own house.  My family tried to help but did not know what was happening with me.   I was then committed for 2 months; where my behavior got even more erratic at first.  Living with strangers in a strange place, seeing people who hardly spoke was both scary and confusing.

But with medication, my mind started getting clearer.   Although I had to give up my volunteering position at the nursing home; I was able to find a new job once I got back home.

If there is one thing I had to say, it is this:   I still live with the fear of the psychosis coming back, of my brain lying to me all over again.  But I have learnt to deal with it on a day to day basis. There is hope; let me assure you.  Try some journaling, write down your thoughts and how you feel, it has been therapeutic for me. Try to be kind to yourself, it’s not your fault that you have this illness; and most importantly; YOU ARE NOT YOUR DIAGNOSIS.  You didn’t ask for it, but now that you have it; finding the right coping mechanisms is the key.  Keep working on your goals, to have some goals is always good so you have something to work on to distract yourself from any intrusive thoughts you may have. Try telling people you trust what the signs could be if you have a psychosis, so they understand, because people may not realize when you are not lucid/have a psychotic episode.” Says a lady who was diagnosed with a mental illness in 2015, and since then has been striving to make a difference in other people’s lives.

Here are some of the tips to deal with mental illness:

Dealing with mood swings:

Mood swings can be common in persons suffering from bipolar disorders and certain other mental illnesses.   You feel the tsunami of your thoughts, feelings and emotions.  There is nothing you can do to stop this tsunami.  But you can very well be prepared.

Also, take an inventory of what is disrupting your life:  any toxic relationships?  Toss them out the window; health issues?  Talk to your provider and discuss the treatment options; financial concerns?   Work-home balance?  

Refrain from taking major decisions when you are sad, tense, angry or feel overwhelmed.

And even on days when you feel great, make sure to keep up with your doctors’ appointments and your treatment plans.  Any alterations in your treatment without first consulting with your doctor could end in a relapse.

 Control your stress levels and maintain a regular schedule.  See if your family members or loved one’s can share with your household responsibilities. Avoid energy drinks, caffeine, alcohol and drugs as these can hyper stimulate your brain. Maintain a journal to keep track of your thoughts. A balanced diet, regular sleep and constant exercise can be miracle workers. Also see my article on coping mechanisms to reduce stress:

When Stress Becomes too Stressful…….

Boosting your motivation:

Feeling too tired all day?  Not motivated to work?  Too stressed out about that conference you need to attend?  You are not alone.

“I used to leave sticky notes on my bedside table, on my television and refrigerator.  I also had small sticky notes with positive affirmations in my drawer at the office”.  Says a person who ahs battled depression for years now.

“I never stop celebrating my victories.  I got up from bed today and was out of my pajamas.  That’s the first victory I celebrated today”.  Take baby steps.  One task at a time.  Place reminders of your day to day goals in places where you will constantly see them.  Congratulate yourself on each task/goal completed.

Your brain takes in the thoughts you create the one’s you feed it, so feed your brain with positivity.

Dealing with hearing voices

Dealing with hallucations, auditory or visual, could be an ongoing struggle to those dealing with mental health issues.  However, reaching out for help; or simply socializing/talking to others has helped many to reduce the intrusiveness or even to disable the voices. Being around loved ones can help push voices into the background.  Many of my patients have found success with singing, humming, counting, talking or reading out loud as a way to distract from overwhelming voices.  People with strong religious beliefs have also found prayer or meditation to be equally effective.

One of my patients often found wearing a single ear plug more effective in seeking distraction from the voices.  Wearing an earplug to listen to radio or music kept him suitably distracted while being able to carry on with his other day to day activities and to listen to sounds or noises around him.

Crafts, computer games, puzzles, painting and indulging in hobbies not just help with distraction from voices, but also help in improving the mood and motivation.

Treatment and Compliance:

Just as you would not just stop taking your insulin suddenly all by yourself; any medication for mental illnesses should not be abruptly stopped.  It is necessary to follow a treatment regimen

Also remember that you may be advised different types of treatment modalities based on your diagnosis.  Some examples are:

Psychotherapy or talk therapy

Electroconvulsive therapy

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy to help in PTSD

Work with your clinician to determine what works best for you.  Do not be afraid to ask questions. while on medication you may have received other forms of treatment such as talking treatments and arts therapies that have helped you discover and practice new ways to cope

you may have been able to make changes in your life since your last episode that mean you are less likely to become ill again

if your friends and family are supportive of your decision to try coming off, this can also reduce your risk of relapsing

Maintaining healthy relationships:

Mental illnesses can sometimes create havoc with even the best relationships.    Certain illnesses like the personality disorders will often make the person push their loved one’s away for fear of being let down.  But being aware of the challenges you face, your mood swings and insecurities; can go a long way in maintaining healthy relationships.

Communicate what things are like for you.   Honesty is the best policy.  It is not wrong to say to your potential partner, “At times when I feel depressed; I don’t really feel like going out.  But that shouldn’t stop you from going out”.  Independence in relationships and doing your own thing can help you avoid unnecessary strain in your relationship, especially when you are not in the same mental wavelength.  Share honestly and calmly how your symptoms and certain things affect you or impact your decisions. Together, sit down and plan on how you want things to work.

Know your limits and your weaknesses. When you feel frustrated or begin to feel overwhelmed; step away and enjoy a calming activity.  Take a time out and go for a stroll.

Define your relationship goals, and keep them at the forefront. Working toward common goals will help you move ahead in your relationship goals.

In conclusion,

Mental illness is not a life sentence.   Each one of us goes through various stages through out our lives.  How you deal with mental illness plays a vital role in your recovery.

Some of the additional points to ponder are:

What else is going on in your life right now?   How do your current circumstances affect your ability to cope?

Have you got a support group nearby or other people in your life who can help you when you begin to feel overwhelmed?  Is there someone, who would keep you motivated to take your medication on time?